Every morning, I receive an emailed devotional "Crystal at Daughters of the Creator" (If you're looking for devotional's on-the-go, Crystal is your person here). Now, I don't know Crystal...but it sure feels like she knows me. Each morning's devotional is right on time and hits the nail on the head in regards to what I'm going through EXACTLY each day at the exact time. And lately? I have to thank Ms. Crystal, because her devotionals have helped me cope with my regrets, that all of a sudden, came crashing down on me. I realize now... it's a test. Everything in life is a test...and how we endure the test is what matters. For I truly believe in Ecclesiastes 9:11. "The race is not awarded to the swift, nor to the strong...but to the one that endureth until THE END." I hope you all are connecting to The Spirit this morning. Join Ms. Crystal & lets begins our resurrected life. READ BELOW:
When Jesus’ body was taken down from the cross and prepped for burial, not one person expected Him to rise again three days later. Yet by the power of God, He was raised from the dead and ascended to His Father in heaven. The celebration of the resurrection can’t be underestimated—by the same power that raised Jesus from the dead, we are empowered to live a resurrected life. Before we knew Jesus as Lord, we followed death in the dictates of the world, our flesh, and the devil. We were prone to follow every wind of doctrine that blew past us. However, when we started living a resurrected life, everything changed within us—the darkness become light, despair became hope, and the chaos became peaceful. Living a resurrected life is more than just attending church on a regular basis; it’s an opportunity to take every day as a miracle from God to live to the fullest. Our lives reveal the light and glory of Jesus Christ by our demeanor, attitude, and outlook. It’s not that we don’t have problems or tough days—it’s that our problems and tough days don’t have us. A resurrected life is free to explore the deeper mysteries of God through His word. A resurrected life can know God’s voice and follow the leading of the Holy Spirit. A resurrected life isn’t bound by shame, regret, or fear. A resurrected life is unafraid to take steps of faith in dark places. Jesus could’ve been born on the earth and refused to suffer death for our eternal salvation. Yet He loved each of us so much that He willingly lay His life down and picked it up so that we could live a resurrected life.
Dear Lord, thank You for the resurrected life I live because of Your sacrifice for my sins. I pray for Your resurrection power to give me strength and courage to face every day. Amen.
In His Service,
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Happy Resurrection Sunday! Peace, Love, & Blessings! Your burdens are now free.
This is for you who's been hurt by a family member, sexually abused, strung out, running the streets, and/or down for so long...This is for us.
Jordan Belfort said "No matter what happened to you in your past, you are not your past, you are the resources and the capabilities you glean from it. And that is the basis for all change."
Sometimes our past will eat away at us. It's sure been eating at me, but realize this is what will make us better kings and queens, better fathers and mothers, and better role models for generations to come. We've overcome struggles that some people let defeat them. We're choosing the best solution-living. And as long as we choose to live, sure, the journey will get tough. But the rewards will be far more greater than any sleepless nights, regretful thoughts, and/or shame. We are powerful beyond measure, and it is our trials that will yield us great tribulations.
This is my promise to you. Hang on just a little while longer...and everything is gonna be alright.
To enlighten someone along this journey, I've decided to share my personal burdens at this present moment in hopes that someone is inspired to keep pushing.
1) PEOPLE'S VALIDATION! This has to be my worst one, because I'll put on this facade just to make myself seem more than I appear, putting me in this life filled with lies. I can't count how many times I've lost something or someone just because it didn't meet OTHER people's expectations of me. I can't point out how much I've tried to be in the limelight just to be...IMPORTANT. But, through these storms, I'm learning I shouldn't feel the need to have to be anything or anyone but ME. I shouldn't have to create these elaborate stories just to make my life seem more "glamorous". I shouldn't have to put down others just to play UP myself. Over this past year, it's been a roller coaster, yet a humbling experience in realizing that my life is valuable. I am worthy by just being ME, and so are you. My happiness should not and will no longer be dependent on what people think of what I'm doing, who I choose to fall in love with, or what I choose to do everyday. My happiness is mine...and mine only.
2) Being Perfect! I constantly struggle with my mistakes, even the most simple mistakes. Inside of my mind, I get so caught up with being this "perfect woman" and better yet, striving to be this "Proverbs 31 Woman." And yes, while it may be attainable one day, I can't be hard on myself when I make mistakes everyday. I have to accept that I'm going to mess up. I'm going to lie without thinking about it. I'll sit in gossip. I'm going to hurt someone's feelings unconsciously. I'll take that occasional drink. And I'll make crude jokes that I don't mean, but I say them just to laugh. I do wrongs each and everyday, but I also have a LOT of RIGHTS that make me ME...flaws and all. But that does not change my heart and all the love for others in it. I'm selfish. I'm impulsive and that's fine...but that's me. It's time to accept each mistake and love them at the same time. Because isn't it our mistakes that MAKE us, too? How can we stay standing if we don't continuously fall? Take one day at a time on this journey towards progress but it's time to embrace being perfectly imperfect.
3) WALLS WALLS WALLS. Everyone has gone through an absolute HORRID breakup. I spent 3 years going through one...and while it was absolutely...definitely TERRIBLE. It has allowed me to clearly and confidently (finally) see myself as a Queen. And while I've gained self-esteem I should have had a long time ago, I've also gained another burden...and that's the walls built around my heart. And just when what seemed like the perfect match entered....I opted out, because I don't know how to tear those walls down. Maybe I'll learn and maybe it's going to take a while. But I do know...what's meant to be will always be. And who's meant to be...will always come back. Walls are meant to come down. It just takes the right person, the right experience, and the right struggles to knock them down. Most importantly...it takes courage to put the effort in to knock them down.
Peace, love, & blessings!
Today is a good day. Today is the day that you need to know...my life is in complete shambles. Nothing (oh, and I mean nothing...seems to be going my way), but it's alright. In these past few days, I've been surrounded by the love, support, and the positivity of my grandmother and my best friend. Isn't that all we can ask for? Love. Support. Positivity. Out of the pain, I see love. Out of my fall, I have people pulling me back up. Out of all the negative, there's always something each day that brings a positive.
A good friend yesterday told me "Your life will continue to be in shambles if you don't do something about it". So there it is...no more looking back. Whatever comes, it's my right to meet it head on. Either I can collapse, or I can keep standing. If I fall, it's up to me to either stay down or get back up. But if I keep standing, it's up to me to pull someone else up too. I'm here to pull you up...because if I can stand, you can stand too. If I can dance in the rain, you can get through your pain. There's nothing more beautiful in life than people who can still smile while they're mourning. There's no prettier scene than the rainbow after a storm. There's a rainbow coming our way, and it's going to happen in the midst of everything that has or is continuing to happen to us.
Get back up. Your rainbow is coming.
It's been almost a week, and it seems as though a heavy load is being lifted day by day. I've messed up, I've lied (over and over again) in order to fill some sort of "emptiness" in my life, I've fallen (and continue to fall to the ways of this world), and I tend to hold jealousy & resentment in my heart. But today I woke up and realized...it's alright. I'm human. We are all human, and we are all going to mess up. But the most important part of our MESS is the MESSAGE. What do we know? What do we learn? How will we keep from letting it happen again?
It's simple...you have to spend time with YOU. You have to get to the root of your addiction...understand why you're a "people pleaser"...evaluate the influences in your life. Through this, I've learned that I've put on facades out of blatant insecurities or to make me seem more "exciting". I spend too much time seeking validation. But it is not THE VALIDATION OF OTHERS we need...we need LOVE. WE NEED JOY. Once you are filled with love and joy, God makes you're perfectly PERFECT with yourself. You don't have to lie, you don't have to front, you don't have to be anything but YOU. Because you are you....and I AM I. That's all we can be.
So, if there's that gap that needs to be filled....don't lean on to what has happened to you. Look forward to what is coming. Your mistakes do not MAKE you. And while other people may take a while to understand you...YOU have to forgive YOU. YOU have to understand YOU. This is our next step to being everything we are supposed to be-free. Whatever you said, whatever you did, it's gone and done. Let go, be free, and be happy.
This has to be one of the most powerful messages in Tyler Perry's film, "Madea Goes To Jail". After a fit full of laughs, Madea looks at us and makes a clear point..."Forgiveness is not for the other person. It's for you." Let's be real. We have that father that left us. We have that mother who did us wrong. We have that boy who betrayed us...over and over again. But, we cannot keep holding on to these unfortunate remnants of our pasts. No matter what happened in your past or who happened in your past, no matter how ugly it is, no matter who you think will judge you...How can we ever go forward if we insist of looking back?
I've been looking back for so long. I've been letting regret, remorse, and my mother's mistakes be my sole fuel for motivation for so long that it's consuming me. I mean... ultimately and utterly hurting me. A good friend of mine told me, "Hurt people HURT people"...and it put into perspective everything I've failed to realize. I can't expect to gain, if I'm constantly holding on to my failures. Most importantly, I can't expect to love if I can't even forgive the people who didn't love me. See, life is supposed to be good... even despite the bad it may bring. However, we can't see the good if we keep putting ourselves in this endless cycle of experiencing the bad. A lot of situations, a lot of decisions, a lot relationships could have been saved if I would've listened to Madea..Forgiveness is not for the other person. It was for me.